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Late motherhood, madness or a new reality?


Our aims, our partner and the economic and professional situation all lead us to have children later and later

La maternidad tardía, ¿una locura o una nueva realidad?

We are having children later and later. At 35, 40, even 45, and it is a trend that doesn’t look as if it is going to change. Pursuing higher education over a longer period of time, the difficulty of finding a stable job, a solid loving relationship that takes time to materialise or a failed relationship, frequently makes us  face up to the fact of being 40 and the desire to be a mother is irrepressible. It’s normal. Today, a woman in her 40s is young, dynamic, active, and autonomous and will enjoy good health for many years. That’s why it’s so difficult to believe that your ovaries are ageing and that your biological clock is ticking more loudly. Until now, she hasn’t heard the alarm ring and may find it unfair to have to hurry while she feels young and with a thousand projects on the horizon.

If the woman is in good health and her ovarian reserve is adequate, it is perfectly feasible to face a pregnancy at that age. As in the case of any other pregnancy, she will have to get through the first trimester threshold in order to rule out any risk of miscarriage. With good medical follow-up and some precautions, we shouldn’t encounter any complications. Although it is true that, in the case of women aged over 40, we notice a slight increase in certain risks of gestational diabetes, caesarean section, placenta previa or preterm delivery.

If the ovarian reserve is too low and the results are not satisfactory even after undergoing ovarian stimulation, we will have to think about an egg donation. By doing so, pregnancy can be achieved thanks to eggs from a younger donor. This will reduce the risk of chromosomal abnormalities and miscarriages, either at age 40 or, as the case may be, at age 45 if the medical team sees it as feasible.

Studies have shown that late motherhood may be linked to better maternal well-being and the child’s greater socio-affective development. If the child is born after an assisted reproduction treatment and the mother was afraid of not becoming one, she will take on this role with gratitude. She is aware of the miracle that has been worked and will do all she can to live up to the gift that life has given her. And in the end, that is the most important thing for the child. It is vital that the child feels wanted, loved and pampered like a precious jewel. The age of their parents, in the end, is not so important…

Frédérique Vincent
After finishing her studies, Frédérique Vincent packs her bags and goes to England. While there, she meets her future husband. They marry in 2008. The months and years go by very quickly without any sign of pregnancy. At first, it doesn’t matter: they are very busy with their leisure time, sports, travel. Then the desire to have a child becomes an obsession. When fertility treatment begins, she decides to start writing her diary of an infertile woman. Very quickly, her circle encourages her to continue giving her testimony … She is currently a mother of three and author of La Promesse du mois, a book which serves as a testimony to infertility.

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