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“Nobody had told me that the passage of time is so important for a woman. I didn’t know how long I had at my disposal to become a mother”

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Claudia* is an Italian woman who explains how she and her partner are facing the most exciting journey of a lifetime during their fertility treatment at Eugin

Some years ago, after a long-term relationship, I decided I did not want give up the dream of having a baby. I had always thought that children are the fruit of love and that it would be nice for my son to have a father and a mother. However, over time you evolve emotionally and in how you think. After getting over this break-up, I concluded that I could love a child even without the support of a man.

Was it easy to share this decision with your social circle?
I was inherently proud of my choice, so much so that I shared it with my friends. I had no qualms about it and didn’t feel embarrassed at all. Rather, it was an open and brave decision!

What path led you to Eugin Clinic?
I enquired about the countries where it was possible to undertake a treatment without a partner because, in 2010, Italy was still very far from the current thinking on assisted reproduction. Eugin quickly appeared online and it wasn’t difficult to find the information I was seeking. I immediately got in touch with the clinic through its website and in no time, I received a reply with a detailed price estimate. I filled in the required fields and they designed a treatment adapted to my situation at that time (39 years old and single).

What did you appreciate most about this first contact?
Clarity and speed. And, above all, the fact that they didn’t contact me to find out what I had decided. Moreover, after a few months I changed my initial idea.

What happened?
In 2014 I was lucky enough to find a wonderful man, with whom I would later be able to share the dream of having a child. After all kinds of difficulties in Italian fertility clinics, we became disillusioned. Immediately, I thought about the clinic, which a few years earlier and in very different circumstances, had made such a good impression on me. I found my previous price estimate, revisited Eugin’s website and once again found a great deal of useful information.

Weren’t you afraid you would encounter the same problems?
At first, we were very wary because I was afraid of being disappointed again. During my long experience with an Italian assisted reproduction clinic, I went through serious emotional difficulties because of the scant attention devoted to patients. In my opinion, they had lost the delicacy that a relationship of this kind requires. I often found myself faced with a casual attitude and vague guidelines, the complete opposite of what a woman immersed in a treatment of this type needs. The truth is that Eugin aroused high expectations because it is a European centre with a long history of proposing solutions in a clear way and which cares about the human dimension. We analysed each contact with a fine-tooth comb and we weren’t disappointed. We are pleased with how Eugin has made us feel.

What would you say to a woman who is going to start fertility treatment?
You have made the right decision! Don’t feel bad, don’t let the most awful doubts beset you. You have come here for a reason. There are lots of us, you’re not alone! It’s just that not everybody says it, out of shyness … or shame, maybe. Shame? Why should you be ashamed? Because your body does not respond as it should? Why does this situation make you feel less of a woman? That’s not the way it is. You’re trying to have a child to love. You’re not doing anything wrong. It’s for you, for your partner, for both of you … for life! The road has been difficult and it has led you to make this choice. You ought to be proud of it. It’s only an aid that medicine provides you in order to create life.

And you, what would you have liked to hear a few years ago?
If I went back in time, I would want them to say the same. I would have liked to talk before that, to have had a better understanding of the situation. I have lived in a state of naivety and have ignored certain things for too long. I wasn’t ready. Nobody told me that the passage of time is so important for a woman. I did not know how long I had at my disposal to become a mother. At that time, it was not important. It was later that I understood.

* Fictitious name to protect the patient’s identity

 

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