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How to reconcile yourself with your body?

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Giving it the attention it needs and taking care of it is to move peacefully and harmoniously towards the path of motherhood

Assisted reproduction is a strenuous and painful test on a physical, intimate, emotional and mental level. Medical tests that multiply and endlessly go, on one after the other, tend to become a source of anxiety. The waiting, uncertainty and failures exhaust the mind. The hormone treatments weigh down the body. You may experience a deep sense of unease. How do you get to feel well in both body and mind in spite of this trial? How do you reconcile yourself with your body when it doesn’t respond as you wish, when it denies you your pregnancy, while going through this episode as if your body had betrayed you?

The first thing to do is accept your body as it is. With its flaws, its imperfections and its current, but temporary, refusal to bring forth new life. Your body isn’t your enemy, but rather the opposite: it is your ally in this experience! It isn’t a machine either. It’s much more than that! It has the ability to improve, take care of itself, heal itself and keep moving forward.

Relax … And listen to it … Take care of this body that will soon carry your baby. Feeling good physically is the first thing to do in order to feel completely well. Practise breathing exercises or meditation daily, or at least whenever possible, to reduce all the accumulated stress caused by the treatment. Make positive energy and stimuli circulate round your body, which will dispel the anger and setbacks. Become aware of your needs and respond to them. The small daily pleasures will boost your self-confidence and improve your well-being and your general mood. And it’s proven that keeping your morale high and being calm and optimistic increases the chances of success of an assisted reproduction treatment. Observe yourself and identify those activities or people in your circle that make you feel good, and then use them without restraint!

A simple listening based on affection and understanding will suffice to create small doses of daily well-being. A massage will relax and comfort you, a stroll will allow you to think about something else, let your mind wander. Yoga, Pilates, tai chi or dance are very light sports activities that can give you physical pleasure, reduce stress and fatigue, and allow you to manage complex emotions. Take advantage of this hectic period to discover new activities, live new experiences and get to know new sensations. Don’t obsess about assisted reproduction treatment. Consult professionals if nobody in your circle knows how to help you: psychologists, sophrologists, physiotherapists, personal coaches, support groups, and so on. You are entitled to feel good even if you are undergoing an assisted reproduction treatment and you are living through the most stressful period of your life!

Your story is unique and beautiful, and your family will be too. Your body is also unique, beautiful and sensitive, that faithful companion, which plays a key role in living through this great upheaval and yet immense happiness of being a mother … Giving it the attention it needs and taking care of it is to move peacefully and harmoniously towards the path of motherhood…

Frédérique Vincent

After finishing her studies, Frédérique Vincent packs her bags and goes to England. While there, she meets her future husband. They marry in 2008. The months and years go by very quickly without any sign of pregnancy. At first, it doesn’t matter: they are very busy with their leisure time, sports, travel. Then the desire to have a child becomes an obsession. When fertility treatment begins, she decides to start writing her diary of an infertile woman. Very quickly, her circle encourages her to continue giving her testimony … She is currently a mother of three and author of La Promesse du mois, a book which serves as a testimony to infertility.

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